Friday, 6 April 2007

The D.H. Routine

Some time ago I was in a bar with a few friends and we got chatting to some ladies. The ladies grouped up after a while and went to the toilet together (as they do). While they were gone one of my friends taps me and says, “What are you talking to that girl about? I can’t think of anything to say.”

I just laughed and shrugged my shoulders. The truth was that I wasn’t too interested in the girl and I was basically chatting sh*t. The girl was laughing at my jokes and falling for my corny lines. I wouldn’t say I’m the smoothes cat out there, but I know how to keep a girl interested. One of these ways is my self developed D.H. Routine.

What is it?
It’s simply a routine I developed for getting a girls attention.

I openly admit to watching Desperate Housewives, it’s a great show and I’ve seen every episode. It has an attractive cast of ladies (Eva Longoria), black/dark comedy, enticing drama and it is extremely well directed. Seriously, you need to check out the framing, scene switches, motion camera work and creative angled shots.

Expectedly I catch a little bit of heat when I tell people that I watch this show as it is supposedly for girls. Instead of trying to convince unacquainted people otherwise, I decided to put my energy into something more rewarding . . . getting digits.

I’m Giving It Away
I wouldn’t really class myself as selfish, self-centred maybe, but not selfish. I want to share my routine with some of you guys out there. It’s just to give you a little bit more artillery when you’re called for duty. This is not my most creative, diverse or charming routine, but it works effectively and is a great ice breaker with a get out clause.

This clearly doesn’t guarantee you anything. If you don’t have enough game you don’t have enough game. No routines, chat-up lines or fancy suits will save you.

So With That Out Of The Way . . .

Step 1 – Select a Lady
You’re in a bar with some friends and you spot a tasty looking lady. She’s with some friends and it looks like she’s is having a smashing time. You don’t want to stroll over, disturb their fun conversation and look like a jerk . . . no, that’s the easiest way to ‘see what you can do with o2.’

Step 2 – The Approach
Now you don’t want to directly approach your lady of choice or she’ll instinctively get defensive, you want to approach the group. You want to appear slightly ambiguous, but certainly harmless. If you’re using this routine, you may also want to appear like a fun loving guy. Open up the group, “Excuse me. Can I get your opinion on something please?”

Step 3 – Run The Routine
You’re ideally with a friend at this point, one who is willing to play along with the routine.

“Do any of you watch the show Desperate Housewives?”
It doesn’t matter if they have or they haven’t watched the show, they should have heard of it and at least be a little bit curious as to where you’re going with this.

“My friend here is taking shots at me because I watch it. He is trying to say that the show is just for girls and that I’m gay because I watch it. What do you all think?”
They’ll chat some sh*t and confer with each other. Don’t pay too much attention to what they are saying; just try to gauge how interested they are in what you’re saying.

Now you want to get your feet wet with the girl you have your eye on. But you still don’t want it to appear as if you are working game on her or she’s going to act ‘long’. Throw one or two questions at are her friends and try to get them laughing first. Then turn to the girl you’re interested in and ask “If you were chilling at a guys house and he urgently wanted to watch Desperate Housewives, what would you think?”

If she gives an uninterested response you might want to retreat (like a coward), but if she’s all smiles and gives a detailed response then its game on. Joke around with the group a little bit, but keep your focus on her. If your friend isn’t a waste of space he’ll also be keeping the group engaged leaving you with ample opportunity to start working solely on your girl of choice.

Step 4 – You’re On Your Own
I’m sure you all have your own unique ways of working game, no further steps are required, just do your thing. If the girl seems interested do your thing. If she doesn’t seem interested, do your thing. If she seems cold and is unresponsive you might want to fall back on this one and pursue an alternative.

Before You Ask
Yes I have used this routine on girls, and yes it was with positive results (not always though).

Credit: This post was highly influenced by Neil Strauss’ book titled The Game. I recommend it for both guys and girls. It’s entertaining, insightful and exceptionally amusing.

Now lads, go and get you some digits!

A to the . . .


Sebastien said...

I can admit to watching some Desperate Housewives :)

And thanks for the tip, haha, always good to hear these things! I don't have a particular routine, I like the spontaneity of these situations, but I have a sense of humor so that usually helps...

copper stiletto said...

You are priceless! (had to read this one twice)