They said the wheel couldn’t be reinvented . . . so that’s exactly what I did! I made it rounder and added a few more curves, increasing efficiency by 0.9 percent! I am the shit, the bee’s knees, the dog’s bollocks! I am the empty barrel that made no noise, a walking conundrum with an ego that could eclipse the sun freezing over this hell we call earth. Basically, I am the pirate DVD you were please to purchase until you realised that I am indeed a cinematic experience!
- I could read and write before I went to school . . . so why did I leave with ‘C’ grades in English Language and Literature?
- Seriously considered taking a short course in creative writing.
- Read The Da Vinci Code before it was released as a movie
- Spelling, Grammar and Punctuation.
- Offbeat Humour
- Pub Quiz Knowledge
- Openly Biased Mind
- 14+ Months of A Darker Shade Of Black
- Completed One Chapter of A Future Best-Selling Novel
- George Bush’s Speech Writer
- An Accredited Thesis Disproving The Loch
- A Tale Of Two Cities
References are available on request. But please don’t request them.
A to the . . .